Archive for September, 2012

Accepting my weaknesses!

Posted: September 17, 2012 by Kara in marriage

Talking and accepting my own weaknesses is a hard issue for me. It is hard to look within sometimes and say yes I need to work on that issue in my heart.  I want real but then when it’s time to be real with myself it becomes a little difficult. I start uncovering things that make me sad, hurt, angry, and rejected. I find things within that I hid long ago, things I did not even know where hidden within the walls of my heart.

 

When we can see our own weaknesses and not blame them on our spouse then we will be more willing to work on us and not change the other to accomadate our weaknesses.

 

I have many weaknesses but my flesh wants to blame someone else so that I won’t have to face the things I need to change. To accept means to undertake the responsibility.  We need to take responsability for who we are. We need to accept the good things we bring to our marriage but also the negative things we bring as well.

 

I was having a rough week a few weeks ago and emotionally I felt drained. Waking up on the wrong side of the bed is not something I like to do. When I do I want to run away from everything and everybody. Things get on my nerves more easily.

 

Well I was having one of those mornings. I could not handle one more scream from the kids, one more lets pick our head up because everything is going to be okay. I felt like waddling all day in all the things going wrong. I was stuck in the middle of on my weaknesses, living in my emotions. And in that moment I got upset, I did not think before I spoke, I let my emotions run wild.

 

I was so caught up in them I could not see clearly. I was seeing all these things I needed to work on but did not feel I had the emotional stability at the moment to accept any of them so I lashed out. After the vent I felt bad for my outburst and regretted the words that left my mouth.

 

So tears streamed and then an apology was in order. So thankful to have a hubby that understands my emotional ways and comes along side of me to offer support.

 

I try really hard but seem to fail in the middle of my emotions, a lot of the time. Sometimes I can see and accept the weakness to live in my emotions and I tell myself that these are just emotions not reality.

 

I hope to conquer my emotions and one day laugh about them. But to be honest that is hard to see but hopefully through prayer  and accountability I will be able to step back and see how to work on this weakness in my life. To step back and tell myself it’s not my husband, it is not my children, it is not my mom, it is not anyone, and it is just my emotions running wild again. I have to accept them as what they are and then stand on what Gods word tells me. That He is holding me and helping me through whatever situation that is making me so emotional.

 

We all have weaknesses, we all get angry. Blame is so easy because it gets the focus off of you but acceptance is so much more rewarding it brings peace. Peace that life does not have to be this way. I can change things and change starts with me because in the end the only person I have control to change is me!

 

Is there a weakness in your life that you can choose to accept today and turn it over to God to help make you a better spouse?

Advertisements